Music/Lists

Here’s what to buy Kanye West for his 40th birthday

June 8, 2017

Yeezus just turned 40! Don't know what to get him for his birthday? We got you covered...

What do you get for the iconic hip-hop artist/notorious egoist who has everything, and I mean everything? In case you’re scrambling for ideas on what to get Kanye West for his big 4-0, which is today, we’ve put together the perfect list of potential presents for everyone heading to that private island in the Bahamas for the party tonight. What, you weren’t gonna get him anything? How could you be so heartless?

This insanely expensive fidget spinner – $700.00

Perfect for those absent-minded late-night mixing sessions. Don’t worry, I’m 100% sure fidget spinners will only appreciate in value as time goes on.

This luxury hammock that costs as much as a car – $35,000.00

No successful man over 40 should be living without a hammock, and when you’re Kanye West, why not drop three and a half G’s to really optimize your outdoor napping experience?

The complete Eagles discography on vinyl – $400.00

Now that Kanye’s entering middle age, he might as well join Frank Ocean and get a head start on sampling the official band of the AARP.

South Park – The Fractured But Whole for PS4 – $79.99

Kanye’s had some experience in game dev, so why not check out the competition and get some ideas? Hopefully it sucks and Kanye can get back them for throwing shade.

Diamonds from Sierra Leone

Might be a little out of the price range of most of us, but I bet Ye would get a kick out of the reference. Also, there’s the whole deep moral quandary of purchasing conflict diamonds thing.

Pan’s Labyrinth on Blu-Ray

I bet Kanye would get a kick out of Guillermo Del Toro’s beautiful dark twisted fantasy, if he hasn’t seen it already.

When all us fails, go for the budget option:

A card that says “Lordy, lordy, look who’s got a God complex” – $7.99

 

Simple, cheap, and to the point.

 

 

 

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